Five Good Sips for the Week

or "Do you know what I love?"

“Do you know what I hate?” I often hear this phrase before people go on to list their minor annoyances or inconsequential grievances to me whether I ask for them or not. They then proceed to laugh in nervous, high-pitched bursts, measuring whether or not I think those same human foibles or those particular shows, magazines, celebrities, or behaviors are as egregious as they do. I would like to gently offer the suggestion that we change this tired phraseology around, and in my granola-loving, yoga-stretching, compassionate mother way, tell you: I want to know what you love.

I'll go first. And I will go first every week.

So, do you know what I love?

1. A surprise book by Maggie O’Farrell in the mail.

   I recently gifted The Marriage Portrait to my dear friend in NY as a housewarming gift, and we make a date to talk every fifty pages. We talk about the book, but also about her new life post-Brooklyn, and we get to connect with meaning over our shared love of good writing, passionate story-telling, and being the only ones in our former book club who ever finished the books. I also met with high school friends recently and spent a delicious weekend eating great food, watching the Oscars, and drinking wonderful wine supplied by my best friend who made it: Cartograph Wines in Healdsburg…go there! When I came home to Seattle, I wanted to make sure to stay connected to these bright, loving, and fun women, so I sent them This Must Be The Place in the mail, and suggested we not wait so many years to talk about the book or to each other.

   

   maggie o’farrell and daughter (photo: Graham Turner)

2. My husband’s new book Doubt Riding Shotgun and its bright yellow cover.

My husband, Dave Hill Jr., is a writer. He is also a drummer, coach, friend, father, brother, thinker, dreamer, doer, artist and soul-searcher. He has written a book for all of us who struggle with our small voices. The voices that tell us, “You’re not good enough” “You’re an imposter” “You will never be like those you envy”. He tells us to make friends with that voice, that doubt, and to find the freedom in loving all parts of ourselves, even those we feel shameful about. He writes with passion and compassion for the reader, and he makes the writing of a book and publication process all look so easy. I love the photos of the bright yellow covers that are popping up all over the place on social media, in so many countries, and the loving words that reflect the moment a person realizes that doubt does not have to overwhelm them, but instead can lead them in the direction of loving themselves more fully. I urge you to read it, and not just because I’m in love with the author. Well, maybe a little bit for that reason.

3. Kareem Abdul Jabbar’s recent post about Women’s History Month

   I, like so many, never miss Kareem’s Substack and find his thoughtful, honest, and insightful commentary a balm to all the vitriol out there in the world. Even though he is unafraid to engage with controversial topics, it is always done with the same elegance that made him a joy to watch on the basketball court. I especially admired this week’s post which opened with a discussion of the word: feminism. It reminded my of my ninth grade classroom, and asking a group of teenaged girls whether or not they considered themselves feminists, and what they thought a feminist looked like, and being told everything from “hairy-legged man-hater” to “an old white lady”. I relished in the clean and polished dictionary definition of the word, which made them all pause and reconsider. Over the years, I have been contacted by many of them who still remember that classroom lesson, and I felt so validated to see it again mirrored in Kareem’s article. There are so many treasures in this particular post, but if it is the only one of his you read, it will have been worth it.

   4. Thinking about Silence and Billie Holiday’s version of “Strange Fruit”

   When I was a teacher, I was interested in exploring silence in literature and how to help my teenagers become okay with cultivating silence in such a noisy world that was only growing more distracting by the day. So one way I conveyed how powerful silence can be was to show them this clip of Billie Holiday singing “Strange Fruit” without the sound on. They would then write about what they noticed and how sound might change the experience, then of course we read the Abel Meeropol poem and talked a great deal about metaphor and America’s brutal history. And finally, we listened to Holiday’s soulful, bittersweet rasp and felt the power in her voice with the lyrics on the screen, but only after seeing it with our eyes first.

   

   billie holiday

   5. Spring

Finally, the renewal season is upon us. New projects, new conversations, and the sun. The season when you open your hands to welcome raindrops and wind, sunshine and hail, all of it, all at once. So here is a poem to read in the spring for you, “[since feeling is first]” by e.e. cummings.

keep writing, friends.

x A